Does Merv redeem himself in the jungle?

On I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! Campfire Tweet Game. Courtesy: Channel Ten

OKAY, first thing's first: there is absolutely no truth in the rumours flying around that an upcoming Tucker Trial will involve one of the campers having to eat a kilo of frozen Chinese berries.

Some things are just too cruel.

Mind you having said that, the latest Tucker Trial was just plain verging on the medieval.

And what made it even more compelling was that it was Merv who stuck his neck out — quite literally this time — in an effort to redeem himself with the rest of the camp.

Because (and let's be honest) he was even starting to get on my nerves and I'm several time zones away and I only have to spend limited time with him.

Merv sticks his neck out Source: Channel 10

You see Merv is just like that uncle that you only see at Christmas. And there's a good reason that you only see him at Christmas; Sure, he's fun at first, but by early evening he's said enough inappropriate comments and cracked enough lame jokes that you can't get him in a cab fast enough.

Oh and just like that weird uncle, Merv seems prone to post traumatic stress disorder. Except that in Merv's case the disgusting thing he did in the jungle wasn't part of a war but of a celebrity reality show. Speaking of which, seeing as this is Merv's 85th reality show, he really should know by now that the producers and the viewing public aren't happy until each and every contestant has a meltdown.

Gogglebox. Hats off to you, Merv. Source: Channel 10

But tonight you couldn't blame the big fellow for wanting to spend a bit of time in the quiet corner. I mean, he had just shoved his head into several boxes containing bitey, scratchy, crawly nasties. Some of which were among his own personal phobias.

And speaking of mental disorders there is something so awfully Freudian about Merv's bald dome of a head bursting forth, birth-like into a box filled with writhing snakes, that I'm certain psychology students will find it in their exams papers for years to come.

But he did get all of the stars on offer, which meant that the camp was spoiled for choice come dinnertime.

And just in time too, because we hadn't yet given Lauren a chance to get her cranky pants on.

Oh, but she whipped them on quick sticks, and just pray tell what was the reason for tonight's particular hissy fit?

On I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! Dinner Time Heats Up. Courtesy: Channel Ten

Beetroot.

Yes it's a little known fact, but this particular little root vegetable has been the cause of at least four revolutions, two wars and nine binding United Nations resolutions.

Ah, Lauren, when Maureen gathers the tribe around her you will be her wicked second in command.

Or she'll tap out some time this week.

On a lighter note, one of my favourite lines of the night was Chrissie Swan sitting on a waterspout and declaring "this is the most action I've had in three weeks". And seriously if that last sentence needs explaining to you then you obviously haven't been watching.

But my favourite line had to go to Freddy Flintoff who seemed more than a tad upset when a Twitter user suggested that he should be subtitled because of his accent.

Freddy quite rightly and proudly said "I speak the Queen's English". Unfortunately for Freddy, he said it in the same episode where he also uttered, "I've got a house back at home" Really, Freddy, really?

It's starting to resemble Gilligan's Island on acid.

Mikey Robins spent seven years behind the microphone as host of Triple J's National breakfast show before becoming a team leader on the iconic Channel Ten series, Good News Week. He's added stand up comedy to his long list of achievements and in 2011 Mikey went to Afghanistan to entertain the troops. You can follow him on Twitter @MikeyRobins